Etikett: childabuse
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After
TRIGGER warning – child sexual abuse, trafficking, cult abuse. This is out of context unless the blog has been read in a chronological order. Guinevere, 5 years old: ”If someone asks whether you belong to The Society or The Family, you say The Family”, Eric’s mother instructs me. ”What is The Family?” I ask. We’re…
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The Night
HUGE TRIGGER warning. S***nism, child sexual abuse, water torture, death. Only read this if you are sure you can handle it and have some support afterwards. This is out of context unless the blog has been read in a chronological order. Guinevere: I’m crestfallen after trying to speak with Samantha. Sniveling I approach her siblings,…
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Efforts to escape
TRIGGER warning – Forced sedation. This is out of context unless the blog has been read in a chronological order. The bedroom door slam open inwardly. Eric’s father steps in, staring us down: ”No escaping today!” Eric calmly walks out, followed by me and the other children. If we can we’ll run when we’re outdoors,…
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Obedience
TRIGGER warning. Programming, talk of abuse. This is out of context unless the blog has been read in a chronological order. 5 years old Bianca: I see the breakfast laid out before us, I feel the chair I’m seated on. I’m leaning against a wooden table. I can still see how the sunlight streamed in…
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Chasing clouds
Trigger warning – references to child sexual abuse This is out of context unless the blog has been read in a chronological order. Guinevere, 3-4 years old: I’m spinning in circles on the graveled yard. Head thrown back, searching the sky: only whisps of clouds. Too thin, transparent! God couldn’t sit on one of those…
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Mornings gone missing
Trigger warning – child abuse Bianca, 3-6 years old ”I’m so grateful you’re bringing her along”, my mother says blissfully. ”I can’t believe you have the energy for it, with all the children of your own”. Eric’s mother looks delighted hearing this. ”You know what they say – it takes a village to raise a…
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Heroes
Trigger warning – child sexual abuse, drugs This is out of context unless the blog has been read in a chronological order. Guinevere, around 5 years old: ”They didn’t even get our clothes off! Only my pants, and I’m putting them on right now!” Philip, one of my older cousins, was performing a victory dance…
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Shelter from the rain
Trigger warning – child abuse Furious drops of water cascaded against the windows and rushed in rivulets across the street outside. It was cold in the stairwell. We huddled on the marble floor, leaned back against the wall. I was probably the warmest of us, sitting on your lap and sheltered by your arms. Someone…
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Stairs to my nightmares
BIG Trigger Warning – Cult stuff, child sexual abuse, physical abuse I see them in my dreams sometimes. Stairs, leading down. Hard corners and sharp edges, such that will really hurt you if you trip and tumble. The unforgiving kind. I always wonder what I’m doing there. I would never go to a place like this…
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Bianca
Trigger warning – sexual abuse, ptsd Integrating alters is a funny thing. Bianca is who I used to be for so many years. Bianca was an innocent front alter, who did not have a clue to the existence of other alters than herself. Now that I’m integrating more, I’m changing so much, and I feel like…
Writing our heart out 